Wikisilliness

Someone (User ShiftyMcCoy) entered this into the Wikipedia:Sandbox on Jan. 14, at 22:19:

Recently, I had a rather roving intellectual discussion with someone over some mac ‘n cheeses. The discussion took a number of twists and turns–from the meaninglessness of life to the possibility of a deity–but at some point, we lingered on the concept of chance. How performing one small act, or changing one tiny detail of our past, can have massive ramifications.

With that in mind, I now pose to you perhaps the most massive and important philosophical quandary I’ve ever pondered, one that I’m sure would keep even the most brilliant of thinkers up for days:

……How the fuck did drunken Snapchats lead to all this?

How on Earth did the tomfoolery of two drunken boys lead to nearly a year’s worth of adventures, laughter, mockery, music, and memories?

I have no idea. All I know is what I *didn’t* know; and on December 24, 2014, I did NOT know that my boozy, excited “YES!” to the question “Do you wanna drunk Snapchat some people” would lead to this.

And because of all this, you’ve come to mean a great deal to me. You’ve become perhaps my favorite adventure partner. You’ve become one of my closest and truest friends, one whose unflagging loyalty and undying support I’ll always be able to count on. You’ve become a person I immensely respect, and (quite obviously) a woman I most fancy.

Yup.

Let’s follow this editor further, shall we?

Nastilicious blanks the page, inserting the following:

Kiersten Bunnz is an Transgender Adult Entertainer and Webcam Model, she is 30 years of age and resides the county of Sanford in the state of Florida. Her website is http://www.chaturbate.com/p/nastillicious Her Facebook is https://www.facebook.com/TS.KierstenBunnz Her Twitter is https://twitter.com/TSKierstenBunnz

A bit of autobiographical content. Capitals and punctuation are all awry. This user also tried to create a page on themselves, a common mistake. Harmless.

Ever the literary genius, ShiftyMcCoy swiftly and masterfully responds with:

Kiersten Bunnz is a MASTURBATIN’ Transgender Adult Entertainer and Webcam Model, she is 30 years of age and resides the county of Sanford in the state of Florida. Her website is http://www.chaturbate.com/p/nastillicious Her Facebook is https://www.facebook.com/TS.KierstenBunnz Her Twitter is https://twitter.com/TSKierstenBunnz

Followed by the most eloquent

Your music video: You, clothed in the vestments of the priesthood, cloaked in a red liturgical robe and a golden cross, standing as the conductor of a choir of WHORES. Blood drips down thy arms, sweat flies from thy brow, and the camera zooms in for tight shots upon each of their unholy faces. Your body undulates as your arms thrust violently, your crimson face bulging, until you keel over with a heart attack. As you lay dying, the video intersperses scenes of childbirth and war. THE END

 

Mm.

Further in the past shows a brief history of nonconstructive, vandal-minded, and unambiguously inappropriate edits. However, they clearly put more thought into it than the average blanker, profanity-inserter, repeating character spammer, and troll. Thousands of bytes have been devised and warped meticulously into a regurgitated mess, befouling the innocent pages with their unequivocally nonfactual content.

 

This person is clearly superior to me in either the curation or generation of random and ridiculous content. It is simply embarrassing. For which one of us I’m not certain.

I look forward to following their future edits.

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